An Avalanche of Excitement!

It’s been such a while since I posted anything here that I actually have tons to post! And, of course, not very much time to do it in. But I figured I will give you an overview now, and then, over the next few days, hopefully actually say something substantive about each of these things.

First of all, Word Up, the amazing community bookshop I’ve blogged about before, needs help. We lost our space in August and are having a huge fundraising campaign to reopen, and, not incidentally, there’s a dance video in which I (and many others) dance to show our love for Word Up. Word up is supremely important to my neighborhood, and the concept of Word Up, a community space dedicated to books, art, music, theater, and education and performance of all kinds, is supremely important everywhere. I hope you’ll watch the video, because it is super amazing, and check out the campaign and throw some love, money, reblogging and tagging, etc. our way. We have a long way to go, and every little bit counts. //www.indiegogo.com/wordupbooks

Secondly, my story “Woman-Time” is included in The Best Lesbian Erotica of 2013, edited by Kathleen Warnock and Jewelle Gomez. My story has magic in it. The real kind, as well as the sexy kind. You can get it here:http://www.cleispress.com/book_page.php?book_id=503 or at your local queer-and-small-press-friendly bookstore. I know here in NYC you usually get it at Bluestockings: http://bluestockings.com/. Also, I will be reading from this story at the KBG bar in NYC on December 20th! Please come! I would love to see friends both known and as yet unknown there. Here’s more info on that:

Drunken! Careening! Writers!

Best! Lesbian! Erotica! 2013!

Rebecca Lynne Fullan

Sid March

…and special surprise guests!

with your hostess, Kathleen Warnock

Thursday, Dec. 20, 7pm

KGB Bar, 85 E 4th St., NYC

FREE

Finally, my poem “Telling My Beads” was published in The Other Journal as part of their Prayer issue, and you can read it right here: http://theotherjournal.com/2012/11/29/telling-my-beads/ It’s based on a true story, and includes a rainbow rosary. Also, if you like, I will read it to you– there’s an audio file on the top of the page, and that’s me reading the poem.

So: community book & art spaces, sexy stories, and poems about prayer. That is a good summary of some important aspects of my life, and certainly my writing life! I hope you check them out, and I hope to write something more substantive about each of those things in the coming days.

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Inheritance at Underwater New York

So, I’ve decided to do this Author Blog Challenge to get blogging again, especially now that I’ve finished writing my last paper for the semester, and I saved some good writing news just to get started!

A couple of months ago I found this cool project/website/organization called Underwater New York.  What they do is go around to the waterways of New York City and environs, and find all sorts of strange, evocative stuff in and around the water.  Then they post about it on their website and people write stories, poems, even songs about the stuff!  Seeing that I love strange, evocative stuff, water, making up stories about strange, evocative stuff, and I live in New York City, I was pretty excited and raring to go.  They were having a flash fiction call when I found them, and I decided to write about an 1897 pocket watch found near Coney Island.

Here’s a link to all the tiny stories that were published about the pocket watch: http://underwaternewyork.com/2012/05/16/flash-fiction-submissions-1897-pocket-watch-coney-island/  Mine’s at the bottom.  With my name on it.  And it’s called “Inheritance,” so the title of this post is now making tons of sense.

I noticed that nearly all the stories about the pocket watch had some aspect of it being inherited or at least a special gift, and also that all of them had something to do with death or loss.  I guess the pocket watch aspect lends itself to the former, and I wonder if most stories about things being lost in the water related to death or loss.  It would be interesting to try to do one that was really jubilant, or something!

Anyway, I hope you enjoy the story, and that you check out the rest of Underwater New York, and that you come back throughout the month to see how the blogging challenge is going.  I’m not sure what the challenge is, exactly, mostly just to blog and read stuff by other writers, which I’m excited to do.

If you’re stopping by for the first time, welcome!  I’m glad you’re here!  Please feel free to say hello, and tell me a story about inheritance or pocket watches or Coney Island or finding stuff in the water, or whatever you like.

Yay Blog!

Guest Post: Anne E. Johnson on the Queer and Loving World of “Braids”

Anne E. Johnson is my guest today, speaking about how she conceived and crafted her story in Resilience.  Tomorrow is the big day– come and see Anne, James, Emma, Bill, Eric and me at Word Up from 3-5 PM!

My story, “Braids,” is meant as a literary experiment. When you read it, you’ll notice something unusual: All of the characters are gay. Male, female, kids, adults. All of them. I did this for two reasons.

First, I’m fascinated (to put it kindly) by the many people in the world who like to pretend that LGBT people don’t exist. They look around them and see a completely straight world. They watch TV shows, go to movies, and (maybe) read books that help them sustain this fallacy.

So “Braids” is kind of a counter-attack, a world where everyone is queer, yet nobody is ignoring them, bullying them, or afraid of them. They’re living their lives within the usual spectrum of love, loss, happiness, and pain, just like characters in a story in which everyone’s straight.

Second, I wanted a level playing field. I wanted the focal point not to be the characters’ queerness and people’s reaction to it, but how they see themselves. Nobody makes a big deal about anyone being gay. Nevertheless, everyone in the story has self-doubt. The point is that it’s hard to stay confident as you navigate through life, no matter what your sexuality.

Likewise, problems of self-image don’t evaporate just because we grow up. We do have to keep working on how we view ourselves, continually convincing ourselves of our own worth. The character Lateesha learns that as she and her mother both question their value, their looks, and their potential to succeed in life and relationships.

I’d say that the central message of “Braids” is that it doesn’t matter who you love; what counts is how well you love yourself.

[Please visit me at my website, AnneEJohnson.com]

Resilience Reading and Open Mic

We’re looking forward to seeing you tomorrow, but if you can’t make and/or are far away, here’s how to get Resilience: http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback/resilience-stories-poems-essays-words-for-lgbt-teens/18926125

Guest Post: James R. Silvestri’s Unlikely Resilience and Unexpected Affinities

Today, I’m pleased to introduce James R. Silvestri, writing about his own relationship to resilience and his story in the book.  I bet you know where and when you can hear more from him– this Saturday, 3-5 PM, at Word Up Books!

In a lot of ways, I might be considered an unlikely choice for a project associated with resilience, with personal strength and inspirational perseverance.  I am an extremely private person, sometimes painfully so.  Ask me for my opinion on anything, be it my favorite TV show or the traits I look for in a partner, and prepare for a sliding scale of awkward shrugs and stammering.  This is part of the reason I became a writer; it’s a lot easier to express myself through well thought-out printed words and fictional characters then to simply speak what’s on my mind.  It’s always been that way.  For the record, I am no misunderstood teenaged wallflower.  I am 34 years-old.

And yet, the Resilience anthology spoke to a very vibrant, very vocal quadrant of my soul.  When the whole “It Gets Better” campaign started to make waves at the wake of several suicides and violent attacks among LGTB youth, I was skeptical at first.  I knew the intentions of all participants were good and pure, but I thought the message was off.  “It Gets Better” seemed to embrace what my favorite comic strip upstart Calvin of Calvin & Hobbes once referred to as “The Culture of Victimhood.”  In my mind, the campaign encouraged young people in these adverse situations to embrace their roles as victims of the cultural war, to acknowledge their current state of weakness and lean on the required guidance of school authorities and legal guardians, as well as the hope that if you hang in there and try to stay alive, things will magically fix themselves.  There was no talk of fighting back, of demanding self-respect, of creating a multi-step plan that would actually make one’s life better.  It all seemed so passive, so defeatist, this “It Gets Better” business.

But then, I came to realize a few things:

1) Young people, particularly those who grow up in small communities or ghettoized inner city neighborhoods, usually don’t have a model to work with.  When you’re gay or transgendered or any sort of ostracized minority, you usually don’t have access to this Great Life Plan that will drag you through and past the muck.  So, suddenly, “Just Get Through Today, Then Tomorrow, Then The Next Day” suddenly seems like a more valid plan of action.

2) Sometimes, a young person who has just had enough of the torture, the name-calling, the abuse and the cyber-gossip and what have you, will in fact take action.  Columbine taught many of us this lesson in 1999, and Chardon gave us a refresher course in 2012.  Adolescence is a time of extreme emotion, and extreme emotions can lead to extreme actions, be it suicide or murder.  So once again, telling someone in this situation to chill out, take stock and keep hope sounds like a pretty wise plan of action.

3) And really, who the hell am I kidding?  I was a fucking mess when I was a teenager.  I barely spoke a dozen words during my four years in an all-boys Catholic school.  The only way I survived was to make myself invisible, and the few times I was forced into human interaction, some sort of teasing or nastiness was directed towards me.  Nobody can stay invisible forever, not even me.

And you know what?  If my 34 year-old self could go back and time and meet my 15 year-old self, you’re damn right that I would tell Mini-Me that It Gets Better.  Because it does–it did.  Yes, I am still a socially awkward oaf, but in the adult world I live in now, it’s okay to be that.   In fact, in a era where people can’t seem to shut the hell up, it’s actually a sort of commodity that I actually possess the ability to listen, to assess.  And on occasion, I can even break through that shell.  For a few hours a day, I in fact must do this professionally as an English teacher.  Lecturing has become a new way to harness my nervous energy and my over-arching quest for connection, and I am much better off for it.

My story in Resilience is called “What Happened to Mona Shalesky?”, and like all of my published works, it’s fiction.  I am not a small-town lesbian waitress, nor am I a drifter transman.  Although I’ve come to meet a few people in this life who are undergoing various stages of transgenderism, it is not a condition I can immediately relate to.  While almost everything else about my life feels murky and (at worst) lost at sea, my gender identity has been pretty secure.  So, naturally, I am gravitated towards people and stories about this type of journey.  While I don’t identify with the specifics, I can relate to the universal truth that life can be difficult, and people will not always understand what you’re going through.  And while it does in fact Get Better, it never Gets Perfect.  That’s what keeps life interesting.

Resilience Reading and Open Mic

Since now I’m sure you would love to know what happened to Mona Shalesky, mosey on over to the buy link for Resilience: http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback/resilience-stories-poems-essays-words-for-lgbt-teens/18926125

Guest Post: Emma Eden Ramos on Endurance, Resilience, and the Search for (Literary) Selfhood

My guest today is Emma Eden Ramos, here with a story of her own journeys through adolescence and literature, and the queer resilience that can arise out of both of these strange categories.  She’ll be reading at Word Up this Saturday, from 3-5 PM!

Adolescence is, for many of us, a time of pain, endurance and discovery. Pain, not only because our bodies and psyches are changing–our emotions in a constant state of flux– but because we are surrounded by others who are experiencing the same turbulent transformations. So much of adolescence is about being able not only to handle our own inner battles but to endure the fallout of others’.  When I look back on my own high school experience, I feel proud to have survived. My peers were cruel. I was called freak, ugly, bitch, loser. The most painful, however, was in the middle of my freshman year of high school when a boy I’d been friends with in middle school told the entire grade that I was a lesbian. At that time (2002), even in New York City, being labeled “gay” in some high schools could be dodgy. In my case it was like walking around with an “A” pinned to my shirt. People stopped talking to me, sent me cruel messages on AIM, badgered me with prying questions — “Are you a lesbian? Huh? Huh? Can’t you just tell us?”– In the end, I had to find a new high school. It wasn’t, at least for me, the accusation itself that was so hurtful. What I struggled with most was that other people were labeling me at a time when I was unable to label myself. This was my period of self-discovery, and it was being taken away from me.

Fast forward to the spring of 2009 when I am, thankfully, a good six years past my early high school days. While studying Psychology at Marymount Manhattan College, I decide to balance out my required Statistics course with a class in Contemporary Literature. I’d always been a voracious reader, but there were certain genres I had yet to discover. Well, by the end of that semester, I was left feeling both awakened and jipped. Andrew Holleran, Sarah Waters, Leslie Feinberg, Shamim Sarif, how had I managed to miss these authors, and during those years of relentless questioning and insecurity?

The novels we read in the Gay and Lesbian Literature course at Marymount inspired me to write my first story, “Where the Children Play.” As a teen I’d read about Cathy and Heathcliff (Emily Brontë’s Wuthering Heights) and Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy (Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice). But characters such as Kitty and Nancy (Sarah Waters’ Tipping the Velvet) or Maurice and Alec (E.M. Forrester’ Maurice) had eluded my radar. I wanted to write a modern coming-of-age story in which the teen protagonist is able to overcome the convictions of his family and society.

“Where the Children Play” isn’t just a story about self-discovery. It’s a story about tolerance and even acceptance. Adolescence, for everyone, is a time of both struggle and revelation. To make it through these trying years, one must have endurance. The process of enduring the journey toward self-respect and awareness requires resilience, especially for those whose preferences and lifestyles aren’t yet respected by society at large. With the recent number of teen suicides, it is clear that society has some serious growing up to do. In the meantime, young people need to know, whether it’s through the literature they read, the television they watch, or the music they listen to, that there are many of us who have come through on the other side. But it takes endurance. Endurance and resilience.

Resilience Reading and Open Mic

Emma’s website is here: http://emmaedenramos.weebly.com/.  Please go visit her, and, if you want even more lovely writing, here’s the link to purchase Resilience: http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback/resilience-stories-poems-essays-words-for-lgbt-teens/18926125

Resilience Reading Coming to Word Up this Saturday!

We hope you can make it!

Hey everyone!  As this image indicates, there’s going to be a Resilience reading and open mic this Saturday, March 17th from 3-5 PM at Word Up!  It will feature Resilience editor Eric Nguyen, and Resilience authors from the New York area, Bill Elenbark, Anne E. Johnson, Emma Eden Ramos, James R. Silvestri, and me.  We’re planning to read our pieces from the book and then to open things up for other people to read their work, ask questions, discuss the project, etc.

To make the week delightfully resilient all around, my fellow authors have written guest posts for this blog, which I will start posting tomorrow, and continue posting throughout the week.  So– if you want an appetizer for the lovely writing you’ll be hearing on Saturday, or if you can’t make the reading and you want to participate virtually, please come by all week and check things out.

And don’t forget that your stories are always welcome here.  🙂

Of course, if you are in the New York City area, please come by to the reading on Saturday.  We want to have a gay old Saint Patrick’s Day with you.  And especially, if you know any young folks who could use some strengthening words, please pass the message along.

Chatting with Charlotte about Royal Quarry

Royal Quarry is ready for release! Cover art by Anne Cain.

So, tomorrow is the release day for Charlotte Rahn-Lee’s novella, Royal Quarry, and to get you ready for the release, Charlotte and I managed to collaborate on an exclusive interview.  You may be wondering how this worked– we were wondering how it was going to work too!  Basically, I pretended I didn’t know anything about the book, and wrote down my questions in a notebook.  Then, Charlotte wrote down her answers.  Now, I am going to type them up here and ask her follow-up questions when they occur to me!  It’s a little silly, perhaps,  as a procedure, but I think you will find the content interesting.

RLF (that’s me!): Give a little intro about yourself and your background as a writer.

CRL (that’s Charlotte!): I am an inveterate creator of stories– my sister Lilah and I invented all sorts of characters, plots, and happenings for as long as I can remember.  I think I began thinking of myself as a writer in 6th grade. My writing training is all in playwriting– I have an MFA from the New School for Drama.

RLF: What happened in 6th grade?

CRL: I was in a different school district in 6th grade, in Cambridge, MA, and there was more emphasis on writing in this new school.

RLF: Is there anything in particular you want to convey to potential readers of Royal Quarry that isn’t mentioned in the blurb?

CRL: Royal Quarry was a lot of fun to write, and I hope it will be a lot of fun to read, too.  I did my best to impart this sense of fun while I was condensing the plot into blurb-form.

RLF: What prompted you to write this story?  Tell us something about how it took shape in your head.

CRL: This story had an unusual beginning.  Albert and Manning existed as characters in an epistolary game that you and I were playing.  Because of this, their relationship really had a chance to develop and grow in a satisfying way.  This story is a retelling–a reboot, I guess you might call it– of how they met.  I wrote it because you were planning on submitting to the “men in uniform” call for Dreamspinner, and I kept urging you, “Manning wears a uniform!  Write about Albert and Manning!”  You had other ideas, however, which eventually became The Clown and the Magician, so you convinced me to write it instead.  It was fun to write something for which I knew the characters so well but could dream up a new plot, choosing elements of the original version and inventing my own as it suited the story.  That’s the joy of a reboot, I suppose.

RLF: As I remember it, you had a whole bunch of ideas for the men in uniform thing, including a story about Manning and Albert, and kept pitching them until I was finally like, well, you should write one yourself!  I’m glad you did. 🙂  Since you most frequently write plays, I’m wondering how this experience related to your other writing.  Were there any interesting differences in the writing process for this prose piece?

CRL: Yes!  Prose is very different from drama, a medium I’m more comfortable in.  You have a lot more control over how your audience experiences your story in prose than you do in drama.  [In prose], you can draw the reader’s figurative eye to specific details in a way that reminds me of screenwriting.  You can describe your characters’ thought processes, even!  I was conscious with writing this story of not wanting to go crazy with my new-found powers of prose and explain or describe too much of what people were thinking.  You still do want your characters to show you what’s happening with them after all.  But it was a lot of fun to work in prose for a change.

RLF: What was your favorite part about writing these characters and their relationship?

CRL: I love how Albert’s (over)reactions always surprise, and I am very fond of Manning’s continuous struggle to maintain his professional composure.

RLF: Did you encounter any surprises while writing?

CRL: Of course!

RLF: How did you like writing a story that is centered around a romance?  Was it similar to or different from other kinds of relationship-based writing you’ve done?

CRL: The most unexpectedly tricky thing was the pronouns.  When two men relate to each other–sexually, romantically, or otherwise–in prose, your sentences become tangled knots of “him”s, “he”s, and “his”es.  It took some clever editing to make clear who was doing what to whom.

RLF: Did you learn anything new (in research or otherwise) while writing Royal Quarry?

CRL: I learned more than I will ever need to know about deer hunting.

RLF: Do you want to write more stories about these characters or this world?

CRL: I sure do!  Albert and Manning go on to have many exciting adventures together.  It would be a lot of fun to write down some more of them.  It would be really great to see them in a graphic novel– I’ve always wanted to try writing one of those.  Anybody know any sequential artists?

So there you have the interview!  Do you know any sequential artists?  Do you have more questions for Charlotte?  Let us know in the comments!  Are you ready to buy this fantastic book?  Here’s where you can find it, starting in about ten minutes: http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/store/product_info.php?products_id=2477

Enjoy!

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